Wellp. It’s time to change servers.




It’s been brewing for a while but lately, I haven’t really been feeling WordPress lately. I’m going to keep this up though in case anyone wanted to refer to the older posts and reviews  for later and maybe one day I can actually convert everything to the new site. But for now….




Biggest Insecurity CHALLENGE!: Face Off

Honestly, I’m scared to death about this post.

Yesterday, I decided to check out Beautylish when I came across Andrea’s latest blog post about her starting a challenge:

Hey! I am starting a Challenge for anyone wishing to participate in it with me :]

[. . . ]
[. . . ]
[. . . ]

I want YOU to create either a video response on YouTube, Leave a comment on my FB page, Take a picture and post it on my FB wall, etc. Whatever you want and let me know you did the challenge! I want to see everyone’s posts. I congratulate anyone willing to do this, because it’s a big step to come out with something embarassing about yourself that you don’t like to talk about. Also, a big thing when it has to do with your appearance.

Please participate, it’s extremely liberating, I assure you!

If you wanted to check out her post, it’s here!

And it was actually going to tie in with what I wanted to talk about today. You see, I want to be involved in the Gyaru community. I want to talk about the fashion and everything but the key thing about the Gyaru community is that: it’s about appearances.

Even if some Gyarus are unable to afford the MARS or Liz Lisa brand name socks, they still have the ability to say, “Fuck that, I’m going to make this work!” And they do. I want to be able to do the same thing and connect with others but something was in my way.

My biggest insecurity. Truth to be told, I’m a bit insecure about my body but not as bad as it was before. I’ve learned to love my body the way it is and that it’s my temple. I’m going to treat it right and get to the shape I want.

But it’s not my body that disappoints me in my eyes. Instead, it’s my face.

I just… have no words. (Old picture)

It isn’t the skin on my face or my hair that bothers me. It’s my eyes. It’s my nose. It’s my lips. It’s my shape. I’m always afraid that I’m going to mess up the makeup and my whole look will be ruined. Or because of my nose, it’s going to ruin my look. Or because of my full lips, I can’t wear the cool lipsticks others can, or rather, I feel odd with it on. I hate how my chin is. I hate it. Or that I just don’t look “right”. I feel like there’s something on my face that isn’t visible but I just want it off and because of that, my confidence went down a lot.

Honestly, what you’re reading is about 20+ years of pure emotion and raw feelings I had growing up. I never felt confident about my face. I was never comfortable with it. I always felt that my face always got me into trouble just because of what’s on it. I’ve thought and considered plastic surgery but only on my nose.

People had always told me how they envied my lips but really that’s about it. I always felt that I was too plain and that any attempts at makeup would seem like I’m “trying too hard”.

The most recent picture I have (as of this post).

But if I want to defeat this monster, “insecurity”, then I have to post pictures of my face. I realize that mistakes will be made and this is all part of the learning process. I have to not be scared of showing my face on the Internet. I have to be brave.

So there you have it. That’s the biggest insecurity I have. I’m sure you guys will probably think I’m crazy for thinking such a thing but alas, it is what it is.

Now tell me, what is your biggest insecurity?

Anime & Fashion: Where Does Inspiration Come From?

Now I know there are some fellow Gyaru (other than just me) who enjoy anime and manga as much as the next fan. Not gonna lie, a lot of my fashion inspirations come from anime. The difference between real life fashion and anime fashion is that those are animated (obviously) and a lot of the stuff are just either impossible to find or just plain non-existent. And not only that, the anime girls’ proportions at times can be extremely not even human. They’re cartoons. I mean, it’s pretty obvious that they are and they’re drawn to a human scale (of course there’s certain exceptions).

Anyway, back in 2011 (at least back when this article here was published), Gentosha Comics released a fashion magazine titled “Moeurs” that was aimed to the fans of anime who are also into fashion. However, instead of using human models, they are drawn. In it, they would describe about 10 different types of fashion and their features in pretty good detail.

The “models” were drawn by the popular mangakas, illustrators of light novels, and Pixiv artists.

I’m not sure if it’s still in publication though. I tried looking it up on Google but alas, I couldn’t find any information about it.

I understand that is old news and everything but it really gets me to wonder about our fashion inspirations, especially if we’re inspired by anime. Would you still get this type of magazine?

I know there’s an anime called Super GALS! which chronicles the lives and adventures of three animated Kogals (since it was made in the 90s back when Kogals were around) and that’s what sparked my interest in the first place. I read the few volumes of manga that was available where I was at the time and I got really curious so I looked it up online.

Back then, I had so many questions and it ties with my search for more Gyaru history books. Granted, some of the questions are answered and everything but… hmm. Perhaps it’s just the history geek within me to learn about the history of Gyaru and to learn more about its roots!

Scruffy Rebel as Rainbow Dash (Taken by LJinto)

As most anime fans are aware, there is a way to bring the impossible fashion from anime to reality by cosplaying.

Cosplay is a word that combines the words “costume play” into one. Of course, cosplaying doesn’t limit to just anime – it’s popular among the comic book fans, video games, and so much more. There’s so many talented seamstresses from all over the world and people who build the accessories needed for their characters. And of course there’s always those who aren’t so good (like me).

There are those groups of people who do walk around with costumes on either for “shock value” (basically, see how people react to their costumes in 100°+ F weather) or because they like the fashion of it so much, they just wear it. Or they’ll wear the accessories.

But then it goes into what a person can or cannot cosplay. There are girls who are not as skinny as most of these other good cosplayers but they can pull it off. Or, dare I even mention it, I don’t think I could pull off a good costume because of my skin color.

And that’s besides the point I’m trying to make. One of these days, I’ll make a post my feelings about the cosplay world and how different colors of skin can work for or against it but that’s a whole can of worms I don’t want to open now.

In any case, do Gyarus even cosplay? Could you say that Gyarus cosplay? I had mentioned this before in my Top Five Dos and Dont’s in the KPOP & JPOP World that those B-Gyarus and the J-Cholas grow dangerously close to brown and black faces. But they’re inspired by the culture.

I don’t know though. One could argue that Fairy Kei, Decora, and arguably Lolita got their inspirations from the various shows like My Little Pony, Hello Kitty, Winnie the Pooh, anything from the Disney franchise, or even Invader Zim. Others can say they’ve tacked that on only to make it look cooler, see if they can stand out more, or make it more about what they like

Hmm, maybe I’m making myself more confused. What do you think? Should we still be able to take fashion inspiration from anime & cosplay? Is it as bad as taking inspiration from Japanese, Korean, or even Chinese culture? Feel free to share your thoughts!